I didn't kill this one I swear; it's not even my fish. It's Teddy's Siamese Fighting Fish AKA Jaws 2.0. Jaws the First froze to death last year. Feeling bad for Teddy losing something he really liked I bought a new cool USB powered fish tank from Thinkgeek and we tried again. He was doing well until winter started. E ven a mild Sydney winter is tough for a fish from warmer waters. Once again the internet provided the answer when I found and bought a special heater for small tanks. The heater warmed things up just enough make the fish happy. He liked to curl up next to the heater. In fact he scared me a few times as he didnt move around at all and I thought he was dead. Then I'd poke him with a finger he'd squirm around and I'd spend ten minutes scrubbing my hand. It was our little game. I know, I need a life.
Recently though, I realized that Jaws 2.0 was no longer with us. In fact, he seems to have shuffled off this mortal coil several days ago. There are sections of his body that are either caught in a space-time continuum loop or they have begun the decaying process. No amount of squeamish poking him was going to bring him back.
I looked around the fish tank and there are no tiny pellets of fish food. Teddy saves his aiming skills for the AFL so when he feeds Jaws 2.0 he usually feeds the desk too. I haven't wiped up the computer area in a few days (don't judge!) so this means he hasn't been feeding the fish. I find that odd since he actually liked Jaws 2.0 and was annoyed when I murdered the living room fish a few weeks ago. He's done a fairly good job of taking care of his pet so that makes me wonder why he has stopped caring for one of the few things he actually likes in this house?
My bet is that he knows Jaws 2.0 is dead. He knows and he doesnt want to clean it up. He's waiting for me to notice so I'll clean out the tank. Yes, that sounds like my duplicitous twelve year old. THAT makes sense.
So it's come down to a battle of wills. His desire to not risk touching a dead fish and being forced to clean something versus my desire not to touch a dead fish and my already being up to my neck in having to clean something.
It's a parenting dilemma. Sure I can march into his room, as he's home sick today and demand the removal of the late fish.
That's easy enough. However I think I want to preserve the spirit of ignoring it. At least the spirit. I'm going to let Jaws 2.0 rest undisturbed for a bit. Not too long. Even I have a level of grossness I won't cross. But I am curious. How long will he go before he cracks and says something?
I'm taking bets on him lasting until the holidays start. When that happens he will be parking his tush at the kids computer to play on Steam as many hours as I will let him. The more time I let him sit there, the more time he has to look at the fish that ceased to be. Soon, I bet the absence of life will annoy him into saying something.
Whatever, I'm dreaming I know. This is a kid who wore his school uniform over 24 hours the other day because he was too cold/bored/busy to change. What does he care about a decaying fish when his decaying socks don't trouble him? At least though I can pretend for a few minutes that he will pay attention to things around him. Then, as soon as I smack the stupid out of myself I will get down to sending Jaws 2.0 off in style. As the last fish I think he would deserve to have the best spot in the front flower bed.
The tank however, will be Teddy's job to clean. I'm not touching that thing on a bet.
