Gonna Pay for This One...

It's 3:15 am and I've been up for over 2 hours. The death cold/flu/plague/seasonal allergies that has a grip on me woke me up to remind that my throat hurt and that my eyes are watery. Lovely, Now, I can't sleep. I've done nothing to prep for school tomorrow so it's 3 kids off to 2 different schools, make lunches, do bank books, Connor's home reader, doing the girls' hair and I think I left a load of laundry in the washer.

Nice. Can't even crawl back to bed after drop off because I need to help a friend. No Judie, don't even tell me never mind, I'm showing up. I'll be whinning and generally annoying but I'll be there.

I'm thinking I'll go back to bed now and wake up at 6. Maybe if I'm lucky I can force myself to be in a good mood. I doubt it, but I hope. Good news is that Teddy's birthday is this week. My little man is going to be 9. That doesn't seem possible. Of course, if doesn't lose some of his attitude and grossness, he may not make it to 9. It's a day by day challenge around here. I may have to do a daily recap - just a simple, "He Lived" at 8pm. Maybe Teddy is the original "The Boy who lived," I hope he is, then maybe he could use some magic to send away my cold.

So much for the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave

I just read an article in the Sydney paper today that just chapped my hide completely. Apparently there is a movie about Charles Darwin that is not going to be picked up by American movie theaters not because it's a crap film; no, no, because it's too controversial. Apparently a movie depicting Charles Darwin's life is just too shocking for most Americans because only 39% believe in Evolution. I wonder if the polls interviewed anyone OUTSIDE the Bible Belt states.

There is a website - don't bother, I'm not giving them press here, that discusses and rates films for their Christian audience. Fair enough, I think it's fine to have your own views; however they have the audacity to imply that Darwin's theories regarding evolution are somehow a direct link to Hitler's attempt to butcher an entire group of people. Yep, according to these folks, Darwin gave Hitler food for thought and that let to his atrocities.

Apparently it's websites and groups like these nut jobs who are persuading the theaters not to run this movie. They'll buy crap like, "Dude, Where's My Car, "Starship Troopers" and "Hannah Montana," but a biography about an important historical figure - whether you agree with him or not; you have to concede he was significant, this film gets pushed back.

What a bunch of lame asses. I am disgusted that people like this get to run the show for everyone. So much for free thought. If you're part of the majority Christian group it's all good, hell you can even claim to be a persecuted minority. For the rest of us, we have to sit and lump it and "tolerate" your backwards opinions otherwise we get labeled as persecutors.

So just when I think it's good to be in the States I get reminded of why I wanted to move to Australia. Not even sure I want to see the film. Doesn't matter, at least I get to decide, for myself. Just like I USED to be able to do back home. Shame you. Shame on all of you who allow this nonsense.

Ah-Choooo

Sick for a solid month now. Yep, a month. I've got some sort of cold/flu/allergies/swine flu/schistosomiosis thing that is reapidly sucking the will to live right out of me. Every couple of days a fever comes out, the sore throat, cough, body aches and it just repeats. Now I have this eye gunk thing happening that's either pink eye or allergies to the new spring. I give up. I've been pouring every drug down my throat that's nothing legal left to try. Tomorrow after cricket I may go out and score my first hit of crack.

Hey, don't judge me. My laundry room is exploding, there are clothes on the line from days ago. The dishes in the sink? I think most are from today - I remember doing some washing up earlier but I can't be sure if that was today or 3 days ago. Cooking dinner? Ha, ha, ha. You're funny. Tonight we had the ever entertaining and nutritious cold cereal. Take Sasha to the dog park? Fun-ny! Now I'm just opening the front door and only slightly hoping she comes back. Of course that is doing WONDERS for my campaign to get a kitten. Ted is really confidant about my abilities to care for yet another living creature right now. If he would count the dust bunnies as living creatures my stats would be WAY up.

It's 7:51pm on a Friday night. Ted's out gallivanting around and I'm counting the seconds until 8:30 when I can finally get Teddy down and I can crawl off to bed. We have an 8am cricket game tomorrow. The first of the season. I'm so not ready. I plan on sleeping through the game. Considering how exciting cricket is...Under 9's cricket nonetheless this should not be that difficult.

Time for Another Parenting Award

Connor is still breathing. Yep, that's it. I get an award for allowing her to continue to breathe. Not that imppressive you mutter? Well, obviously you either have no children or you simply have not met Connor. Regardless, the fact that this child breathes is a true marvel and when other parents find out I will be lauded as the Second Coming of Greatness...or something like that.

I went to bed early (shock, I know) but this time I went because I'm sick. Ted had an important corporate basketball game so I put the kids to bed and while under the influence of cold medicine that was enough of a feat that I simply went to bed. At some point in the middle of the night Connor barged in my room and wanted to know if it was time to get up. I couldn't even turn over to check the time, I just croaked, "No! Go back to bed!" I think I threw in a "damnit" but I'm not sure. It was really good cold medicine. She stormed back out, muttering how much she loved me...or hate me, I'm not sure. Anyway, about 5:30 - I know this because this time when I opened my eyes, I was facing the clock, it began. "I WANT MY BREAKFAST! WHERE IS MY BREAKFAST! MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY" Lather, rinse, repeat.

I dragged myself out of bed and out my room and kicked in her door. "WHAT are you DOING?" I shouted in a hoarse whisper, didn't want to wake Tessi. Connor starts crying and telling me her tummy is rumbling and wants her breakfast. Of course Tessi bolts up. I suggested that she lay back down and I will get her breakfast at a more civilized hour. Of course I phrased this in a most unpleasant, very non-June Cleaver-like manner. I'm sure there were some threats of bodily harm and permanent removal of Barbie dolls and burning of dress-ups. Again, I'm not really sure as the cold medicine was helping me to see the Grateful Dead dancing bears floating on the ceiling. No matter, when I left, Connor was still sobbing and I was passed out again in a few minutes.

At 6:15 I dragged myself out of bed, opened the girls room and said, "Alright you can get up now" Then I went and released the hound and let her outside. Hmmm, no girls. Odd. Got Sasha back inside and now Tessi was crawling out, literally. She likes to pretend to be a baby pussy cat first in the morning. Don't ask. We've decided to think it's cute. Still no Connor. I went into the kitchen to brew my first cup of courage and then Madame pops out. She had fallen asleep. Grrr. What does she want for breakfast? "I want nothing. I'm not hungry," she cries at me. Offended that I was annoyed at her.

She's breathing Ladies and Gentlemen. Still alive. I'm still waiting another 15 minutes before I do her hair because I'm still concerned that I might strangle her with the hair bow.

The other day a friend asked how I was doing and I responded, "I'm a SAHM with 3 kids and a dog" Her response? A very sad, "Ohhhh" Yeah. That's how I am. Just mail my award to me, I'm too tired to make it to the ceremony.